Websites

Posted by Tara | Life Coaching, Money, Personal, Personal Finance | Thursday 10 June 2010 10:48 am

wwwI have not been feeling well so here is a quick post of websites I like, recommend and/ or read often. Some are finance related and some are not…

www.getrichslowly.org/blog/
I read this blog every day. Some articles are better than others but I have a similar philosophy and have gotten some good tips.

www.financialliteracymonth.com
This website was mentioned in the Main Street Financial Solutions Newsletter this month. Yes, we missed April being Financial Literacy Month (I assume they chose April because that is when our taxes are due) but this website has a lot of good information for getting your financial house in order.

www.napfa.org/consumer/index.asp
National Association of Personal Financial Advisors (NAPFA) is a great source of information. I believe in fee-only planners since I am one and like the transparency and focus of this organization. This site allows you to search for a NAPFA registered fee-only financial planner in your area.

http://richchicks.org/
I just think this is a super cool site. Fun to read and aligned with my values.

www.tut.com/theclub
I have been a fan of Mike Dooley’s his The Daily Notes from the Universe for years. I love the daily insprirational e mails.

http://www.gravelandrust.blogspot.com/
I read this blog everyday. She is an incredible woman. What she has accomplished and her attitude are amazing and inspiring. I learn a lot from her wonderful words of wisdom and enjoy following her life story.

50 Simple Pleasures

Posted by Tara | Life Coaching, Personal | Tuesday 11 May 2010 11:18 am

I saw and liked this post so much I created my own list…
sunset
50 Simple Pleasures
1. Feeling the sun on your face
2. Soft luxurious sheets
3. Comfy bed
4. A restful night’s sleep
5. A really good hug
6. Kisses that give you butterflies in your stomach
7. Singing at the top of your lungs
8. A beautiful sunrise
9. The satisfaction of a job well done
10. Trying a new recipe and loving it
11. Reading a book that you don’t want to end
12. A child’s laugh
13. A child’s picture / drawing
14. Snuggling on the couch
15. A great run or walk outside
16. Feeling strong and healthy
17. Being in the zone
18. A back massage
19. Watching a thunderstorm come in
20. Beings silly with a friend
21. Getting a love note
22. Feeling the wind on your face
23. Pictures of loved ones
24. Sleeping in late
25. A lazy morning doing whatever you want
26. Learning something new and interesting
27. A good hair day
28. Admiring the beautiful big sky
29. Clothes that fit perfectly and you feel fabulous in
30. Finding what you want
31. Expressing yourself clearly and confidently
32. Interesting and meaningful conversations
33. Typing super fast
34. Laughing so hard your stomach muscles get sore
35. An answered prayer
36. Autumn leaves
37. Spring flowers
38. My teddy bear
39. Holding hands with a loved one
40. Feeling connected
41. Accomplishing a goal
42. Seeing someone shine with happiness
43. Driving fast on a curvy road
44. A beautifully set table
45. A delicious meal you remember for weeks
46. Easily finding a parking space right in front of where you need to be
47. Peaceful silence
48. Feeling grateful
49. Catching up with an old friend and feeling like not a day has passed (you are so comfortable together)
50. Someone saying exactly what you need to hear

THE 10 Things That Make Me Happy

Posted by Tara | Life Coaching, Personal | Wednesday 20 January 2010 3:04 pm

Happy-101I saw this on a couple of people’s blogs and decided to join in…

Here is my list of 10 Things that make me happy (in no particular order)

1. My husband - who is so sweet and treats me so well. He truly is my best friend. I love our talks and time together. I miss him when I don’t get to spend enough time with him.

2. My family - I truly have the greatest family in the world and wish I got to see and talk to everyone more often. I am enjoying our new venture on myfamily.com to stay in better contact.

3. My workouts - They keep me sane and healthy and help me to better enjoy my life.

4. Driving my convertible with the top down - I say this way too much but it does make me so happy. I love wind and speed.

5. Soft luxury sheets - I saw this on Roxie’s blog and it is so true for me. I am glad she reminded me though.

6. Just sitting and talking with my friends - This is usually one-on-one or in a very small group. I can do this all d*** day with those I click with and it is truly an awesome day.

7. Being outside as much as possible I love to hike and see nature. I like to eat outside as much as possible.

8. Reading – I am surprised this did not pop into my head earlier on the list. I don’t think I could live without books and reading. Reading is my escape and is one of my favorite things to do. Once again, I could do this ALL day (and sometimes do on vacation).

9. Getting a Massage

10. Listening to and enjoying music I love – This can change my mood in a heartbeat.

11. Living in Princeton and all that provides to me, especially within walking distance

I feel like I could keep going…
eating a super yummy meal…sleeping in late…traveling to new places…strong water pressure…beautiful sunsets…being at the beach…lovely supportive notes from my husband

I have done this exercise with many life coaching clients although I usually request they do a top 25 list. To me the amazing thing is how many of these things do not cost much or anything, and make me so happy.

Here are the are instructions that come along with this:
1. Copy the image and display it on your blog.
2. List 10 things that make you happy.
3. Try to do at least one of them today.
4. Pass on the award to 10 (+/-) bloggers or friends who brighten your day.

Creating Your Theme for 2010

Posted by Tara | Life Coaching, Personal | Monday 4 January 2010 7:12 pm

shining starAre you tired of having the same New Year’s Resolutions year after year?

Laura Burkey, a Master Coach I worked with as a client (and think very highly of), introduced me and others to this idea and the process of setting themes instead of resolutions.

What would you do to make 2010 your best year ever?

I have set a Personal Living Theme for the past few years. I have enjoyed the difference of having a theme for the year instead of resolutions. It has been interesting to see the ways the theme has manifested itself in my life.

I love that there is no “failing” with a theme.

What is a Living Theme?
A living theme is a more powerful and engaging way to set off your new year than the old usual resolutions.

Have you ever noticed that resolution broken down means to re-solve?

Laura Burkey, a Master Coach, decided on setting themes instead of resolutions back in 1996 after years of starting each year with the same darn resolutions. She thought it was depressing and embarrassing to begin each year with the same resolutions…and having just begun her career as a coach…it was imperative to her that she be a model for getting positive results as consistently as possible. So, she shook the resolution thing up a bit.

I am posting this message in hopes of sharing this New Year’s tradition with you. (Thanks to Laura Burkey for sharing her theme concept and process with me.)

Here are my themes for the past 3 years:

In 2006 my theme was “Dare to Love!” I was excited about this theme. It was about LOVING with capital letters my life and what I was doing. The tag lines for this theme changed often. Some examples were: love myself, love my job, love those around me, love and appreciate the rough times and what they teach me, love my family and friends. This theme was about making a conscious decision not to settle for things I do not love and recognize and appreciate those that I do. This theme helped me in making decisions both big and small and raised my awareness in a positive way towards who I am and what I love.

In 2007 my theme was “The Year of New Beginnings.” The origin of this theme came from a statue of the Spring Goddess, or the Goddess of New Beginnings that my sister gave me. I was not sure where or how this theme would manifest itself (or where it came from after all the many changes of the past three years) but I wanted to be open and ready to making significant changes in my life. It truly was a year of new beginnings and growth! A few of the bigger beginnings were: starting several different jobs, creating Kinetic Life Coaching, LLC, moving into a house with my boyfriend, working with a new coach, meditating, and making new friends. I had more beginnings than I could ever have imagined and in areas I never even dreamed of. To me that is the beauty of a theme.

In 2008 my theme was “Break on Thru.” With this theme I was calling myself out of my comfort zone. This past year I signed up for a super expensive platinum coaching program which still makes me gulp when I think about what I have committed to. I got my life coaching website up (www.kineticlifecoaching.com) with a free report and became an equity partner in Main Street Financial Solutions, LLC (www.msfsolutions.com). I also consistently wrote in my journal which as a first for me.

This theme also reminds me of a powerful belief that “you cannot fail, there is only feedback.” My theme reminded me that I needed to be willing to do new or different things to “break thru” and get more information about myself and the world around me. If you keep doing what you have always done, you will keep getting what you always got.

In 2009 my theme was “Sparkling, Shining and Standing Out.” Which manifested itself with a gorgeous engagement ring, a beautiful wedding, starting my blog, speaking engagements, and my first tele-class. But most importantly I have been feeling happier and shining more often.

Creating a Theme may not be for everyone…or for you, ‘right now’. It’s just something I have enjoyed doing and would like to invite you to try it if you feel inspired by the concept.

Eliciting THE MOST relevant and powerful living theme takes time and thought.

Here are some simple steps to help you to find that perfect theme for you in 2010.

1. Start thinking of words, phrases or concepts that have a certain appeal or ‘spark’ to you when you think and say them to yourself. Consider words and phrases that you find would be relevant and inspirational to all areas of your life: personal, professional, spiritual, family, financial….

2. Look for inspirational quotes that (at this particular time) really speak to you.
(I like the website, thinkexist.com for finding quotes.)

3. Think about what you hope to attain or achieve by the end of 2010 as a result of your theme.

My strong recommendation is that you think in intangibles…consider feelings, senses, and beliefs you hope to experience vs. things you hope to have/possess.
(some examples of intangibles: “More Courage to do what I want”, “Confidence in myself”, “Love for myself and others”, “Being Present and/or Feeling Grateful”)

Your theme should become like a mantra for you.

It should inspire you and help you focus on who you want to be.

I am still pondering various themes for my 2010. I will share more in the next few weeks. It can take some time to come up with your theme so be patient. Also don’t be afraid to change your theme. Try some different themes on and see how they feel. You will know the right theme when you find it.

I would love to hear your themes / quotes / ideas that you like and are considering.

Recovering Perfectionist

Posted by Tara | Life Coaching, Personal | Thursday 10 December 2009 12:21 pm

report cardI went and did something I had never done before. It was something I had secretly wanted to do and never vocalized to anyone that I was interested in. This was exciting!

Through an unexected series of events, this incredible and unique opportunity fell into my lap. It seemed like a miracle from the universe for this to be happening and that I got to try something new. Reinforcing that wishes do come true.

I was excited about it and looking forward to it…

It was a complete disaster.

I made a total fool of myself in front of so many people and embarrassed myself in front of my new husband. I think one of the worst parts was feeling like he was embarrassed by me. I felt like I looked stupid and did a horrible job. What a yucky horrible feeling.

I am not one who does well with failure.

I would rather keep myself safe than risk making a fool of myself or of failing. I don’t think this is a positive trait but it is something I know and would like to change about myself.

I was very upset with how I did. I know in hindsight there were many things I could have done differently. I am trying to let it go.

In the grand scheme of things nothing has changed. Those who loved me and knew me before, still love me now. No permanent damage done. Who cares that I failed? (Unfortunately, I do.)

I think because it is something I wanted so much and was so excited about, it felt that much worse.

I can make excuses…I had never done this before…It was not as planned…blah blah blah but I am still amazed at how upset I was that I had done so poorly.

On the positive side, I had some fun and got to try something new. I am proud of myself for going outside my comfort zone and trying it.

I need to remember “Nothing ventured nothing gained.”

I am trying to learn the lesson of letting go of my embarrassment and still be willing to fail which is a very important lesson for me.

I hope someday I will be able to laugh at what happened.

For now I am still trying to figure out why is doing well (being perfect) so important to me?
What am I afraid of?

P.S. This took place a while ago but it has taken me this long to finally digest and process and be able to write about it and yes, I am purposely keeping the specifics vague.

Progress Report

Posted by Tara | Life Coaching, Personal | Wednesday 2 December 2009 6:13 pm

success ladderIf you remember, here are some of the goals I set for myself for the last quarter of 2009:

1) Try yoga = grade B
I have tried it but I am not loving it. I am glad I tried it but due to my lack of enthusiasm (and travel) I have now missed 3 classes. I will go to one more class but we are approaching the end. Part of me is disappointed I did not like it more. I wonder if it is because the class is too long for me (90 minutes). I am proud of myself for trying something new.

2) Find a new coach = grade B
I found a new coach and have started working with her. I am taking December off because I needed a break and I am feeling overwhelmed. I am not making the progress with my coach that I had hoped to. So what do I do with that information??? I am going to just “be” this month and see how I feel and decide what I want to do over the next few weeks.

3) Organize our joint finances and set financial goals for me and my new husband = grade C
I signed up for Mint.com and have a joint bank account with my husband. I have not been tracking our expenses nor moved forward with doing our financial plan. I want to find out if you can manually add entries in Mint but I have not made the effort to do this.

4) Improve my posture = grade B
I have just started to see a chiropractor. I am hoping this will help improve my posture AND help with my all too common and annoying headaches.

5) Post to my blog 2-3 times per week = grade D
As you can see, I have not been posting 2-3 times per week but I have been posting about once per week.

What I loved about yesterday was the wonderful dinner I had with my honey. I was needing some quality alone time with him and I thoroughly enjoyed our time together and our discussions of some sensitive / emotionally charged topics.

Giving Thanks

Posted by Tara | Life Coaching, Personal | Tuesday 24 November 2009 2:20 pm

Happy ThanksgivingI love that we have a holiday that is all about
Giving Thanks and appreciating what we have.

I know I am truly blessed and so lucky for all the good things I have in my life (even though I don’t always feel this way).

Here is my quick list of things I am grateful for (in no particular order):

My wonderful, supportive and loving family

My husband and best friend and our loving relationship

Being an American and living in the good ol’ US of A

My flexible interesting job where I get to help others and make a difference in their lives

My intelligence

My discipline

My love of learning and reading

The great music in my life

My S2000 and driving with the top down as much as I want

Our lovely home in downtown Princeton and the fact that I can walk to the library and lots of restaurants and shops and Princeton’s beautiful campus

My knowledge and comfort with finances and financial planning

My financial security

My close friends and the priceless value of their friendship

My book club and the group of women I have met there

My healthy, thin, strong body

That I feel so happy and have everything I need

That my life is filled with love, fun, and joy.

I hope you enjoy your Thanksgiving and take a moment to thank God and those around your for the good things in your life.

Feeling Better

Posted by Tara | Life Coaching, Personal | Sunday 15 November 2009 12:22 pm

sleeping childIt is amazing what a good night sleep can do to help you feel better.

I was going to look up all the positive aspects of getting enough sleep but am too lazy to do it now.

I know for me, I am very fragile and overly sensitive when I don’t get enough sleep which can mean crying and illogical anger. I don’t always make the best decisions when I am sleep deprived. I have read studies that say you feel hungrier the less sleep you get.

So why don’t we all get more sleep?

I consider myself lucky because I am generally a good sleeper and love to sleep. If I am upset or worried about something it can get in the way of my sleeping but thankfully that doesn’t happen very often. It makes me truly feel for those who have issues sleeping well on a regular basis.

When I am having a horrible day, sometimes I have to tell myself to just make it through the day and hopefully things will look and feel different after a good night sleep.

What I loved about yesterday was an incredible dinner at Vetri in Philadelphia with some friends. This was a wedding gift and was truly a spectacular and memorable meal.

Fragile

Posted by Tara | Personal | Tuesday 10 November 2009 5:09 pm

I am tired and feeling very fragile today.
hammer and egg

The thing I loved about yesterday was my great workout after work and a quiet evening at home reading. I usally workout in the morning but I could not get out of bed yesterday morning. I felt like I got a better workout than usual. Probably because I was more awake.

I also loved the gorgeous warm weather and driving with my top down.

Expansion and Contraction

Posted by Tara | Life Coaching, Personal, Uncategorized | Monday 9 November 2009 3:27 pm

Woo hoo feelingI have read in multiple sources that there are just 2 pure emotions, love and fear.

Love feels like expansion…. joy, happiness, abundance, laughter, beauty, generosity, certainty, goodness, rightness, connectedness, miracles, being in the flow and “woo hoo-ness.”

Fear feels like contraction…meaness, anger, scarcity, fakeness, sadness, struggle, negative, limiting…

Hopefully you get the idea.

I recommend that you pay attention to who and what makes you feel expansion. When do you feel most happy and excited and loved? When do you “lose time” because you so enjoy what you are doing.

Noticing where and when you feel love provides clues for what and who is right for you in your life. It can help you find your purpose.

Fear and contraction can teach you limiting beliefs or toxic people in your life. What can you change and learn from your fear?

My idea for the week is just to notice and become aware of when I feel expansion and love. When do I feel contraction? I want to pay attention to this and see what the patterns are.
______
I love reading my friend Roxie’s blog http://www.gravelandrust.blogspot.com/ and most recently how she has implemented a “The thing I loved about yesterday” that I am also going to try and copy. (Many self-help gurus recommend that you keep a gratitude journal. It helps you focus on the positive and appreciate what is good in your life.)

The thing I loved about yesterday was the gorgeous, sunny, warm weather and spending quality time walking around with my sister who I love dearly.

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